Our current culture in the US leads people to be workaholics. No matter how you slice it, it is a side-effect of our dominant corporate culture. When you trade time for money, the people paying you want to extract as much out of you as possible. The efficiency metrics for American workers are off the scale. The problem is that many entrepreneurial business owners carry this belief system into their own business, even when they have never worked in corporate America. Whether you learned it from your parents or all the people around you, stop and think about how many of your close friends have their own business versus work for someone else. When I ask that question, I find most people have a very few business owner friends versus the later. I was surprised to find that this belief about the value of hard work invades even when your business is successful and not taking all your time. I found I was not alone in getting sucked into business, charitable and volunteer organizations to fill out the remainder of my 60-80 hour work week.

The first thing is to become aware of the tendency that you are killing yourself with activity. By making a daily practice of connecting to your purpose and taking some time just for yourself, it is easier to catch things that are taking you off course from where you want to be. Of course, everyone is capable of finding happiness, joy and fulfillment in their work and life, yet so many people fail to do so. The problem is that it often takes a painful wake up call to move you take corrective action. Many entrepreneurs are afraid to ask for help and will work themselves until they collapse or make themselves ill. I found in myself and many others that even when we are aware that we are not being productive, it is extremely difficult to figure out HOW to break the cycle. The amazing thing is how easy it is for other like-minded people to see what you are doing and help guide you back on course. You probably see it for yourself if you are in a high-level networking or mastermind group.

The challenge is that making changes to unconscious habits can be difficult. Of course, you’ll keep bumping into the lesson that is causing the pain until you really learn it, with each time becoming more painful. You are built for success so you will eventually get it. The amazing thing that I’ve witnessed is with the right guidance, you can get to where you want to be so much faster and easier. It doesn’t have to be hard. You can still feel happy and joyful with your success even it seems to have just dropped into lap. You don’t have to drag yourself down a path of broken glass when a parallel path is made of lush, green grass. Finding the right coach for you is an amazingly efficient method to get you to where you want to be. Of course, there are lots of cookie-cutter programs out there that promise you success and riches. I’ve read tons of books and spent quite a bit of money on group programs and workshops. The problem is not with the materials or programs. They really amp you up for a while and each time gives you a little boost. What I found was once the program ended, I’d fall back into the same, old self-abusive habits. The big changes happened when I found a coach that could create an individual program for me and have one-on-one time to help me see what I was doing and hold me accountable for where I wanted to change.

As humans, we way over-estimate the amount we can get done in a day and way under-estimate the amount we can get done in a year. Like with crash diets for weight loss, we are attracted to things that promise massive change quickly. The problem is that they rarely work because we fall back into the old paradigms. A sustained subtle shift in mindset over time leads to changing of habits and gradual change each day and massive change over time. Say you aren’t exercising at all right now. How long would you stick with a routine of going out and running a couple miles each day right out of the box? In comparison, today go for a 15 minute walk. Tomorrow, go for 16 minutes. After a month and half, you’ll be up to an hour. Now, try running for the first minute and run for an extra minute each day for the next two months and you’ll be running for the entire hour by the end. You’ll look back and realize what a huge change that was in three and a half months, especially compared to running a couple miles for a week or two before giving up, and it seemed pretty easy. Now expand this change to all phases of your life and business. Small subtle changes towards your vision of what your perfect life is. At the end of a year, you’ll be amazed. It helps to have others to help support you because you’ll have days that you won’t want to get out of bed.

If this resonates with you, please read my ebook Unlock the True Value of Your Own Business – Leveraging Time and Money to Have More of Both. My eight week jumpstart program based in part on the ideas in this book, only customized for each individual client, is a fantastic way to see the power of coaching and determine if you are really ready to make massive change in your life and business to find the balance you so crave.